I am scared

I'm not perfect.  I do not spell things perfectly all the time or use perfect grammar.  I know this.  However, I am very tired of seeing people want to "curve" their appetites, "loose" weight, etc.  You want to curb your appetite.  You want to lose some weight.  You weighed yourself (not "weighted").  I'm sorry, but I would rather eat a roll since I can't for the life of me figure out how all these people are eating "roles" whether whole grain or otherwise.  You may have "went" to the gym every day this week, but I personally have gone many times.  I have not "drove" there, but I have driven there.  That is just the tip of the rather large iceberg.  It was bad enough when the stupidity seemed limited to individuals and I could hope that it was not going to become too wide spread a problem.  However, today I was reading Fitness Magazine and saw an ad from Blue Diamond nuts that uses the phrase "curve your hunger".  That means that it was approved by 2 large companies, both Blue Diamond and Fitness Magazine.  Upon further research, my husband discovered that Blue Diamond has been running these ads since 2008 or earlier.  I am disgusted and a little bit terrified at the direction this suggests we as a country, as a world, are headed.

Yogurt is my Hero!

I'm talking about plain, non-flavored, non-sweetened yogurt. I use the fat free variety and I get the Wal-Mart, Great Value brand(40 cent for 6 oz.). Per oz (1/8 cup) it is 13.3 calories, 0 fat, 0 cholesterol, 16.6mg sodium, 2.17 g carbohydrate, 0 fiber, 1.17 g protein, and 3.4% daily calcium. This stuff is AWESOME! I have found so many uses for it that it is not even funny and it is definitely now a staple grocery item in my house. I decided I would make a blog post for a list of the things that I do with this amazing, versatile, wonderful product. I will add to the list when I discover more uses - which I am certain that I will. I use it on my sandwiches instead of mayo. I use it in recipes and on baked potatoes instead of sour cream. I make salad dressing with it - 1/8 cup yogurt, seasonings (my new fav is 1/2 tsp hidden valley ranch mix for 5 calories), and a splash of fat free milk to thin it a bit makes enough dressing for about 2 average salads or 1 large (meal sized) salad. I add various seasoning to it to make sauces for pasta, veggies, rice, etc. I put a touch of lemon zest in it and some splenda and spread it thinly on toast - Amazing! I put a little bit of it on top of (thawed) frozen berries in place of the heavy cream I used to use. I mix a bit in the pasta when making mac'n'cheese with low fat cheese, it makes it creamier and more like "real" mac'n'cheese.

The Impossible Achieved

Today I weighed in at 182.6. I have lost 62.4 pounds, I am almost halfway there, and I am seeing numbers on the scale that are the lowest I have seen in my adult life. This is awesome! Very very soon I will weigh less than my hubby. That's a very significant goal for me. I also have only 3.4 more BMI points before I will no longer be considered obese. I can't wait to be overweight. I know that sounds strange, but if you've ever been obese or morbidly obese (as I was when I started out) then you understand.

For me, successful weight loss always seemed impossible. Now I am sitting here looking at what I have accomplished so far and realizing that I am doing the impossible. There's a song in my workout playlist - You're Unstoppable by Paul Hoffman. It has a line in it "unstoppable begins with you". I liked the song from the moment I heard it, but I have never felt it as strongly as I do right now. I am unstoppable. I'm unstoppable because I decided to be. As the song tells me it is time to do I changed my thinking and found my mission. I decided I was not the me I wanted to be so I decided to do something about it. It's not impossible, there's not some amazing secret to it, it's just a lot of hard work.

Lunch time

I left the gym craving red cabbage. Yes, these are the things I have cravings for these days. My lunch was the result.

Tuna melt with veggies and salad:
1 Oroweat multi-grain sandwich thin
1 can light tuna in water - drained
1 slice Kraft 2% swiss
1 cup spring mix salad
1/2 cup raw spinach
Wish Bone Salad Spritzers - Honey Mustard - 7 sprays
1/2 cup chopped zucchini
1/2 cup chopped red cabbage
1/2 tablespoon grapeseed oil

I cooked my zucchini and cabbage in the grapeseed oil with some turmeric.
I popped my sandwich into my little sandwich toaster.
I ate a yummy lunch.

Calories - 350.3
Fat - 12.2
Protein - 33.4
Carbohydrate - 32.8

I could have had 60 less calories if I'd replaced my grapeseed oil with cooking spray, but it can't always be a how low can you go game. Grapeseed oil is good for you and I wanted it, so there!

Size 12 Baby!

OMG Today I can put on a pair of size 12 jeans. They are too tight for me to wear in public, but I can button and zip them without laying down or doing any crazy maneuvers and I can breathe normally once they are all done up. This is so exciting for me. I have no idea when the last time I wore a size 12 was, but I do know that it wasn't in my adult life. I started high school in a size 14. These are also an older pair of jeans that I found at a yard sale, so it's not even a vanity sizing thing - they are a real size 12. I am over the moon with joy! This will be good motivation for me to stay on plan and get my workouts in for months to come I think.

Awesome breakfast

This breakfast was soooo yummy. It is also more proof that healthy eating does not have to be boring or tasteless.
On this plate:
1 Garden Spinach and Herb tortilla from Mission Wraps
3 servings of south western flavor egg beaters
1/4 cup (38g) of reduced fat shredded cheddar (Sargento)
1 slice of fat free turkey (great value from wal-mart)
9g of onion
35 g of mushroom (Green Giant)
2 tablespoons fat free sour cream (great value again)

I warmed my tortilla in my cast iron skillet and then put it on the plate, cooked my egg beaters with cooking spray and placed them on top. I then put the mushrooms, onion, and the turkey (which I had chopped into small bits) into the pan with cooking spray. I put the cheese on top of my egg beaters, when my onions, mushrooms, and turkey were nice and hot I put them on top and added sour cream. I folded it up and enjoyed a very filling, nutritious breakfast.

465.6 calories
38.6 g protein
43.8 g carbohydrate
12.6 g fat

Strength

Today I was on my elliptical for 45 minutes. I then went on to do some strength training. For my strength training I am currently using 5 pound hand weights and thinking of moving up to 6. During my workout today I was thinking back to when I could not finish 5 minutes on the elliptical, when I was using 2 pound weights and could barely get through the exercises with them.

I love how much stronger I am these days and I can't wait to see how much stronger I get as I continue on this journey. I think that has a lot to do with the success I am having. It is not just about losing pounds for me this time. It is about getting stronger and healthier. I am impressed with myself and I'm ok with saying so.

My things to do

There are so many things that I want to do that I am not able to do (or am uncomfortable with) because of my weight. At this point I am 56 pounds down from my starting weight and I am starting to feel like those things will one day be possible for me. I will probably add more to this later, but here are some of the things I want to do when I get to goal.

I want to hike the grand canyon.
I want to take martial arts lessons.
I want to ride a horse again.
I want knee high boots that actually fit and look good on me.
I want to run a marathon.
I want to be comfortable wearing heels.
I want to wear a bathing suit in public.
I want to stop worrying about whether or not a store will have my size.
I want to be able to do 10 pull-ups like a superstar!
I want to feel comfortable sitting in hubby's lap.